Hazel Cameron, 32 years old
The information age has rapidly changed how we conduct ourselves technology dating business, education, and in general human interaction. Advances such as email, instant messaging, and social media were all created to make communication easier and more convenient. Families and friends across great distances can now more easily communicate face-to-face anytime they want. Dating sites successfully match thousands of soon-to-be spouses each year, and parents can more easily keep in touch with their children throughout the day. However, as society adapts to these fresh avenues of contact, there are also ways new technology threatens to strip away important aspects of how people relate and connect on a personal level. This can be especially true in our most intimate relationships.
Love is often called the supreme emotion, with romantic love considered a peak experience. Ansari, a comic best known for his performance on the TV show Parks and Recreationmay be an odd choice to author a serious book on this subject. Ansari spent over a year interviewing hundreds of people from around the world about their dating experiences and love lives. He also combed through research and interviewed experts in the field—like happiness expert Jonathan Haidt, marriage and family historian Stephanie Coontz, and psychologist Barry Schwartz, who studies the science of technology dating, to name a few. In the past, single people may have met potential dates mostly through family, friends, or colleagues. These days, people can increase their dating choices exponentially via online dating services like OKCupid, Match. The benefits are pretty obvious: your chance of meeting someone that you click with increases with the more people you meet.
In the midst of our technology-crazed generation, we must ask ourselves: how is this going to affect not only us, but future generations as well? It's obvious that our technology-driven lives are truly affecting how we date each other. Texting, social media, and dating apps like Tinder are changing how our generation views first impressions, trust, physical attraction, and relationships in general. With smart phones so readily available, it is no question to text your significant other, or even the person you're casually dating, to see what they're up to. However, in our day and age, it is not uncommon to abuse texting as a means of keeping tabs on someone. Imagine what it was like in a simpler time, when a long-distance couple would share a phone call or receive a letter once a week.
More about technology dating:
It got me thinking about the long term impact of technology on personal interactions, so I requested some input from my Facebook followers. How does technology affect human relationships? Conversations Lack Context: One poster stated a technology dating that almost all of us have felt at one time or another. You can never really know when someone is being sarcastic, funny, not funny, serious or joking sometimes. Misunderstandings, miscommunications and assumptions result, which have an impact on how we view others.
It is now an uncontested fact that technology is pervasive throughout our lives. But how often do we assess its presence in our relationships, recognizing how, exactly, it has impacted the way we interact with those closest to us? Historically, we are going where no human has technology dating before, hooked up to apps offering unprecedented exposure to the innermost thoughts and actions of others, as well as new avenues to spy on our loved ones, cheat, and cover the tracks. A Nielsen survey found that the average American spends 11 hours on social media, and more than half of that time is spent looking at a smartphone or tablet. Technology has put our relationships in beta, redefining how we communicate our desires and trust one another. The science of epigenetics has shown that our experiences may permanently, even heritably, transform our DNA. This means that things we feel, like trauma and loss, change the way future generations are wired. By this logic, can communication physically transform us? For better or worse, we either use these tools to offer our vision of the world in a certain place and time, or to stupefy our audience. He believes the behavior would have eventually manifested without a digital outlet.
The adoption of technology has changed the way we connect and converse with others in our society and dating is no exception. How did your parents meet? Mine met on a double blind date in which my mother and father had mutual friends who introduced them. With the invention of social media it is difficult to imagine anyone going on a blind date again—why would they need to? We not only have a wealth of information on pretty much everyone only a click away but how and where we meet future partners is changing. Before the influx of online dating, meeting partners was pretty much resigned to work, through friends or out on a Saturday night. As a youth, I would look forward to the weekend just so I could meet a new batch of ladies to attempt to woo. With the arrival of dating apps there has been a change in how many of us are finding our partners and indeed what we are looking for.